“Most likely the lump in your breast would be non malignant…we would know only after we operate on you.” The words resonated in my head as they rolled me into the operation room. This was only the beginning of what was going to be my long battle with cancer.
True to my worst nightmares, the lump was indeed malignant and for my safety and longevity the breast was removed. In the days that followed, I felt depressed, dejected, mutilated and experienced a total loss of confidence. Overwhelmed by the experience I rejected chemotherapy treatment.
Soon enough, Dr. Boman patiently explained to me the need of preventive treatment. Awash in apprehension and fear, I finally began my chemotherapy treatment and daily dosage of tablets for the next 5 years. I thought this was the end of my stint with cancer, that I was cured and that I had made it through the toughest part with the support of my husband, friends and doctors.
Ten years later, the disease was back. This time it was my lungs. Following urgent treatment, I was back to chemotherapy. Soon enough as I started to recuperate, the cancer was back, yet again. The doctors told me of the accumulation of fluid around my heart and lungs. The PET CT scan showed increased metabolic activity in the right lobe of the thyroid. The biopsy confirmed that the thyroid nodules were carcinogenic.
Now I was battling not one, but two types of cancer!
A routine abdominal sonography detected multiple metastasis in the liver. A schedule of tablets was prescribed. Five years later, a blockage was discovered in the colon. I underwent a major operation, part of my colon and intestine were removed. It was confirmed that the tumour was malignant and it was a breast metastasis. Post operation I am still undergoing my treatment for cancer.
What is it to live with the disease which constantly turns up at your doorstep like a rejected lover and makes a nuisance of itself? What have I learnt through this experience?
This experience has taught me lessons on acceptance and faith. You, your family and friends are all a team, fighting together for survival and your doctor is the team leader. TRUST him. Follow your team leaders’ advice and keep faith!
Learn about the disease and the medication you are taking. Be prepared for the reactions, recognise the changes and symptoms. Be in tune with your body and respect it. Always remember, the body has the ability to heal itself, give it a chance, complement the efforts of self-healing by being positive, and adhering to medication and nutritional schedules. While everything else is achievable, maintaining a positive attitude requires effort. It requires you to let go of the pain and embrace your new life.
My body moves through time, I imagine it as a machine and like all machines over a period it starts creating problems … my body is important because that is where I live and am known through this body. Constant repair and maintenance is expected and demanded of me. The earlier I recognise and fix the problem the better it is in the long run. I talk to my body, let it know how much I love it, and thank the cells for taking care of me. I talk especially to the malignant cells!
All I have is the firm belief that the God who has brought me here will give me the strength and the means to see me through this. I have recovered from my last operation, the injections are helping me lead quality life.